Thursday, January 10, 2013

January 10

Holding Mommy's hand
Elsie's doctor went over the results of her brain ultrasound with us today to explain the severity of bleeding in her brain. On a scale of 1 to 4, 1 being minor and 4 being very concerning, the right side of her brain is a 2 and the left side is a 4.

That's all I have to say right now.

14 comments:

  1. How blessed we are to have the power of the Priesthood to comfort us and to heal us! We love you very much. Our thoughts and prayers are with you, Clayton, and Elsie continually!! (and the scabby faced kiddo :) Is she better from her scrape on the pavement? Too cute!)

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  2. I went to the temple today and put Elsie's name on the prayer roll (and yours and Clayton's too). You are all in my prayers and thoughts through out the day.

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  3. I love you so much Ruthie! I still believe with all my heart that Elsie will survive this. I am fasting for her tomorrow. See you on Saturday.

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  4. Remember if you can, that Heavenly Father has a plan.
    Hugs to all of you!

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  5. Becca's results were not as measurable as that. All I have to say is that Heavenly Father has a Plan and she will be able to accomplish everything He has in store for her. I love You!!

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  6. Hello! We haven't met; I am a neighbor of Wilford and GayeLee's. I have walked a few paths similar to yours; most closely, one of our daughters, Kristi, was born with hypoplastic left heart syndrome 23 yrs ago and we spent time at PCMC.

    I have been following your blog this week and yearn to be able to say something profound and all-comforting, yet even having been in somewhat similar shoes, I don't seem to be able to find any magic words. I want to thank you and Clayton for sharing your experience; it is tenderly sacred and poignant to read and to relive so many of the same things we experienced.

    I understand the overwhelming amount of information and feelings you're trying to process, along with needing to rest and heal after delivery. I remember myriads of small, tender mercies, like arriving at PCMC shortly after Kristi was transported via ambulance and finding that the sweet nurses had already put a cute name tag on her bed.

    We struggled to take in and understand complex heart medicine...information we'd have rather not ever had to know. I'll never forget the moment and exactly how the light looked in the NICU when Kristi's cardiologist handed us an informative booklet about the heart and heart defects, then told us as gently as he could that our precious little girl's heart defect was not in that particular book, because it was a book about defects they could fix.

    I remember struggling to even know exactly what to pray for, waking the first few mornings disoriented and praying that it was just a nightmare, slowly reaching to touch my tummy, hoping she was still safely inside. Everything from wondering if she survived if she'd ever be able to run and play, to how the financial impact would affect our young family, to trying to understand Heavenly Father's plan for Kristi and for our family...sometimes the thoughts felt like a whirlwind in my mind and heart. Yet, through it all, there were amazing and undeniable blessings, as well as tangible comfort from unseen sources.

    I know you are surrounded by angels, tending to everything they possibly can. I know you will be richly blessed, wherever Elsie's path leads. I know she will fulfill her mission here. I know our Father in Heaven loves you and is watchful and mindful.

    I will continue to check in and to pray for all of you. May the Lord's richest blessings be yours!

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  7. Every single day is a gift! We rejoice with you in that blessing. It is a privilege to get to know little Elsie through your eyes and to be able to pray specifically for her needs as you reveal them to us. It is obvious she has a very great soul in that tiny body!

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  8. Oh Ruthie. It's got to be so hard to see and hear about all the things going on with Elsie. I just love what Diana and Aunt Karen said. First, things will go according to Heavenly Father's plan. Second, we have been blessed with your sweet angel and the power of the priesthood to help bless and heal her. It's an amazing thing. We love you and pray for you constantly!

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  9. You're in our prayers. I know there is not a lot that can be done but praying and wait and pray and wait, but if there is anything Joseph or I can do to help please let us know.

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  10. I am pretty sure there is nothing I can say to help you feel "better"...so I'll just tell you again: Love you Ruthie-poo.

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  11. Elsie, you, and your family will be in my prayers.

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  12. Dearest Ruth, Clayton, Ejve & new Angel in the family,
    this is Rhonda Curtis, I wanted to share with you that my prayers continue to be with you. The night that little Elsie arrived Sarah ask me to pray,,, I got on my knees with faith that our Heavenly Father is watching over her and your family.
    God Bless you in the love you have for your children
    Rhonda & Mark (Colorado)

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  13. agreed with all above comments. Your family is loved by all. I don't know if this helps but Camryn's was 3 on one side and 4 on the other but at the same time she went through a lot more then a typical preemie with other things too. Camryn was a bit complicated even from the beginning! Elsie is already doing better than Camryn ever did. These babies are strong spirits that are sent here for a specific purpose and I can tell you that this experience of raising Camryn has changed me like nothing else has ever and will ever. I believe I am a stronger more confident person and I have drawn closer to my Heavenly Father and my family here on earth (now eternal!) more than I ever could have with out my sweet girl.
    Love you and call anytime you need anything. The flu has left the building so if Evja or your furry kids need a place to hang we would love to have them. Also if you need help with horses, I hearby volunteer Barry. He is a closet cowboy after all :-)

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  14. Hi Ruth! You don't know me, but I am a good friend of the Starrs. Brooke told me last weekend of your "early girl" and I've thought of you many times during this week. We had a 24 weeker 2 1/2 years ago and went through many of the same things you are experiencing now. I think the first week of the NICU was probably the worst. There are so many unknowns and A LOT of waiting. I wish I could say it gets easier or that you get use to being in the NICU. I think we all handle stressful situations in a different way, but thought I'd share just a few things that helped our family make it through in the hopes that some of it may help you and your family too. First, take one day at a time. Some will be good others (like yesterday) will seem absolutely unbearable. Second, let people help, especially with your other kids. I remember thinking my kids were going to be scarred for life because I was trying to take care of everything and they ended up with family and friends a lot. They just remember it as the best summer of their lives. I still cry when I think of the outpouring of service that came at me from all sides. Third, go to the parent support groups or get to know the families that will be there long term like you will be. It makes it so much easier to talk to someone who truly understands what you are going through. It also makes it easier when you don't have to explain all the medical jargon before you explain how it is effecting your baby. Last, keep recording what is happening and how you feel about it all. It's such a whirlwind of doctors and diagnosis that it's sometimes easy to forget which day is which. I wish I would've recorded a bit more with our little one.
    This post is getting ridiculously long, so I'll just offer one more thought if you care to read it. While we were in the NICU I remember being able to feel the prayers of others. I've never had that experience before. I know there were days that it was only the prayers of others going up to a loving Heavenly Father that kept me from falling off the edge. From the comments on here, there are many people praying for you...including me.
    Hang in there!

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